Friday, February 3, 2012
I never did send that email.
Oh, I planned to. I had all kinds of great intentions, but then I thought, 'I'll wait until I calm down a little. Let me think it over and rework it.'
And then life happened.
We need your prayers my friends... like never before!
As you all know, we moved back to Grab-Your-Lasso about six months ago in order to purchase a vet clinic. The plan was to work for a couple of years for the owner, then gradually buy-in, before purchasing it outright a few years after that.
This week those plans changed.
The owner called Shad into the office and laid him off. Unbeknownst to us, she hasn't been taking a paycheck for the last several months, and it is to the point where she can't really afford to pay Shad either. Since we're not in a position to buy the clinic yet, she is letting him go as of March 31.
In the midst of all of this, we can see God's provision. She didn't have to give us two months to find something else. She could have sent Shad packing that very day...but she didn't. God has given us some time...which we are SO thankful for.
She is also allowing him as much time as he needs to search for a new position and to travel for interviews. Again...God's provision.
However, I would be lying if I said I wasn't worried...and yes, maybe even a bit scared.
I'm not letting it win. Really, I'm not. God has truly given me a peace about all of this. It's just a little scary.
Two months isn't that long, really to find a job.
Shad has already started the job search and we have let our parents and closer friends know... about this, but we have NO idea how to break it to the kids. Obviously, we need to do that before they either overhear something or figure it out on their own.
After all the drama/trauma of last summer, when Shad moved here without us, we're concerned about how the kids will take it this time...every last one of them.
Last summer, Alek (13) regressed into asking question after question after question about the situation, and this time I have no answers for him. Anya (11) was my shadow, making sure I didn't leave her sight. Nick (10), who I thought was okay, turned out to be internalizing everything. He STILL won't go to anyone's house to spend the night...even a cousin's home. And Maddie (almost 8 - can you believe it?) regressed into true orphanage behavior. I can't WAIT to see how that plays itself out at school.
I think the thing that saddens me the most, though, is the fact that once again, we're packing the kids up, moving to a new town, starting at a new school and making new friends. When we signed up to be parents the whole moving multiple times thing really wasn't on the radar. We figured we'd find a nice place to live, settle down and raise these kids...hopefully keeping them in the same school from K through 12.
Sigh. It's not to be.
While we really do love this place and we can't imagine living anywhere else, we're going to have to.
If you're the praying type, please send a few prayers up for us. That Shad will be able to find a job to support us... That the kids will (once we tell them) look at this as a new adventure... That I won't let myself be drawn into the 'what ifs' of fear... That our family will come out stronger...and that we'll finally have a place that we can truly call home.